Let's backtrack

Everyone knows that leaving for college is stressful. Even if you're not moving to a different country. Even if you're living at home and going to college down the street...you're growing up. And whether we like it or not, some part of us doesn't want to do that.
When I left for college, I had sort of a rough week. In the days leading up to my departure, I went through a break-up, contracted malaria for the first time (and I've lived in Africa for the past 12 years!), and realized that I knew no one in the area in which I would be going to college. So, needless to say, I freaked out, because everything I knew was changing and I felt like I didn't know anything at all anymore. I spent countless hours crying, telling my mom and my friends that I didn't want to go...hey, everyone deals with it differently! Anyways, by the end of it, I felt pathetic for being so down and not knowing why I felt that way. So, looking for a bit of insight, I picked up The Global Nomad's Guide to University Transition, a book for TCK's that my mom had given me earlier in the year, but I had never bothered to read.
As I perused the pages, I came across a section labeled: "The 5 Stages of Transition", which went like this:

The 5 stages of transition as Dr. Pollock outlines them are:

1. Involvement Stage
2. Leaving Stage
3. Transition Stage
4. Entering Stage
5. Re-involvement Stage

And as I kept reading, I realized how much sense it made...

The 5 Stages

Stage 1 - Involvement

• This is the state of normalcy as you know it. It may be whare you are right now. You are settled, involved in your community, school, etc. This stage is characterized by a sense of belonging and participation. It's really the last place you can call "home".

Stage 2 - Leaving

• Leaving begins the moment you are aware of an upcoming change. It can begin as early as 3-6 months before actually leaving. This is a time characterized by a loosening of emotional ties, distancing from others, and relinquishing responsibilities.

Stage 3 - Transition

• The transition stage begins the moment you leave one place and ends once you decide, consciously or unconsciously, to settle and truly become part of your new place. This stage is characterized by chaos and ambiguity.

Stage 4 - Entering

• Things are no longer chaotic, but you are still feeling marginal and uncertain during entering. You are looking for mentors and friends in this stage to help fulfill your desire to settle in and connect with others.

Stage 5 - Re-involvement

• Re-involvement is a position of feeling settled again. You feel a sense of belonging and participation in your new surroundings. You can now call this new place "home."

Reading this put my mind at ease. Knowing that what I was feeling was completely normal. That doesn't mean that I didn't cry a few more times, but I didn't feel so bad about it. The last time cried about it was the night before I got on the plane from South Africa to leave for the U.S. Once I got on the plane, though, I was fine.
So, all in all, here I am, in Cambridge, MA. We leave for Northampton today, and orientation starts on Thursday. I'm still uncertain about it, but I know that I have to make the best of it. Back in Kinshasa is a life that I am not a part of anymore, and whether or not I like it, I have to start taking some steps by myself. It's gonna be hard, but that doesn't mean it won't be worth the struggle.